The Hanging Edge

If you are like me, then you would probably notice that everything is changing around you as weeks pass and years move on. The annoying neighbor that has gone, a brother that now looks and acts way more mature than you, a relative that now whines every hour instead of every day like in the good old days, or the import taxes that went down so that you can import more questionable Japanese toys, and so on.

But those are changes that come at you. Your life is a new one when the big things are coming FROM you. Things like..

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4. You Are Thinking About Moving Out

I’ve been living with my parents all my life. My parents were baffled at my decision to move out of the city at the age of 16, to live alone in a city famous for home-produced porn videos, rampant drug use, and violence against people with B car plates.

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I will never understand these people.

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Naturally, I was a nervous penguin for the first few weeks. I had to wake up, look and cook for food, do the laundry, clean the room, take care of my things, talk to people, use public transportation, deal with administrative hurdles, pay my bills, blablabla.. all by myself.

But then it grew on me. I’m now used to it. I can’t see myself going back to the way things used to be. I can only now conjure up images of me moving out for good and living my life independently. It’s not like I’m abandoning my parents anyway, never, I love them immensely. Even if I move out soon I’d still visit them at least 3 times a month.

But having your own place to start and end your day, to make important life decisions without anyone interfering, telling you what you can and can’t do, where you can do anything you want, listen or read anything that pleases you, your very own (adult-ish) medieval fort?

Yes, THAT feeling.

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3. You Are Looking At Other People’s Lives

There is a reason to why infotainment programs are so popular. Adults love to beat around the bushes of other adults’ problems, especially when they are worse. They give the feeling of superiority, a negative comradeship, if you will, that there are seemingly-better people out there facing worse problems in worse life situations.

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Like much, much, worse..

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You will probably graduate from university in 3 months, or 6, 9 months, or in 2 years, it doesn’t matter. You are on Twitter, following your graduated friends, or on Facebook, looking at these same friends’ profiles. You begin to look for their recent activities and photos to know what they are doing now. You then compare their lives to what you have now, or even with what you think you’ll have in the future.

You begin to laugh at those people you think are wasting their time, telling yourself that you’ll do better. You begin to tell people how you’ll go about your life after graduation even if they’re not interested. At home, alone, you’re opening these profiles again, now telling yourself that their lives are not THAT laughable, and now wondering yourself whether you could actually do better.

You’re now asking people around to see if they have better plans. You now tell (read: tweet) people of everything that you’ve done recently to convince yourself that you’re actually achieving something and that people are aware of it. It makes you feel better.

For many, they will do this unconsciously, for the rest of their lives.

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2.  You Are Accepting Financial Responsibilities (And Rights)

When did you start paying for some of your own things? When did you start paying for most of your own things? When will you start paying for everything? When did you start REJECTING money from your parents?

Of course, the answers to those questions will greatly vary. Not all of us are blessed with independent financial skills or ways to make money. Some of us have rich parents that would go out of their way to pump money into our lives indefinitely, while some of us are blessed with modest and loving parents instead, though dictated by the reality of us having to look for a job as soon as we got out of college in order to live a sufficient life.

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Most parents won’t mind seeing their children kissing layers of asses.

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Regardless, the moment you start taking most of your financial responsibilities (bills, taxes) and start receiving most of your financial rights (interests, passive income) in return is the moment you should realize that your life now has changed forever. You might now want to look for a stable job, or look to make money here and there, or even to capitalize on your hobbies. Sometimes I feel like even my parents are pushing for this. Liabilities registered under my name as taxpayer? And I was notified only after the paperwork has been legalized?

Challenge accepted.

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1.     You Appreciate And Take Longer Showers

Remember when you were just a kid, and bath time is your most-hated thing ever? At least I felt that way. As a kid I would play all day long without a care in my personal hygiene.

Now as an adult, you take longer showers. It’s not because now you care about personal hygiene, or because you don’t have a girlfriend/boyfriend. It’s because now during showers you would contemplate and make important life decisions. You ponder about the life decisions you’ve made, their consequences, and the future. You think about what went wrong and how you could fix it. You get excited at every imaginative thought. You’re a philosopher during showers and a regular guy/girl when you’re not showering.

When you were little and in bathtubs, you would bring your toys and play with them. You’d sing your favorite cartoon theme song and jump around in happiness. Now you would probably drift away, losing your mind over things that may or may not concern you at all (like how the universe works). You now think of choices, decisions, risks, consequences, and relationships, in your bathtub.

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And sometimes of ways to prevent soaps from slipping off your hand.

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It’s not about being miserable or anything, and it has nothing to do with a person’s level of happiness or whatnot. It’s just that now as an adult you realize that when you’re relaxed is the best time and state to think over and decide things. A shower box (or a bathtub) is a barrier to the outside world you’re living in stressfully (or passionately) everyday, barred from access to cellphones, TV, the internet, work, school, and other people (usually).

You’ll find only yourself, your naked mind and body. Your true, pure, and undisturbed being, something so deprived from adults these days in such a competitive and unforgiving world. If you now find access to these moments of serenity, then you are now impure, and your life is now a different one.

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Has your life changed? Is it changing? Tell me what you think.